The weekend is a really exciting time for Sam for lots of reasons. Most recently, he is in love with Saturday and Sunday naps because on those days, and only those days, at nap time, and only nap time, he is allowed to sleep on Mommy and Daddy's bed. We typically have lots of snuggle, play, and story time on our bed after bath time each night but being allowed to nap there is just altogether different. It is special to him.
From night two home from the hospital, I have been anti co-sleeping (For us only, don't get angry at me if it works for you. I am not saying what's right, I'm saying what worked for us.) After two nights of intermittently waking up with my pillow on his face, or rolling onto him, or puppies laying on him, I realized in order for all of us to sleep well we would not be able to move forward as a co-sleeping unit. And now that's he's 2 1/2, forget about it, he just can't sleep in a room with us. And I don't mean that by my choice. He doesn't like it. Not overnight anyway.
Saturday afternoon I went to wake him from his nap and when I walked in, I thought he was awake and just laying, staring out the window. Either he had JUST opened his eyes or he was in that sort of in-between place. When I laid down next to him, he turned to me and sleepily said "Mommy, you was stuck out in dat boat with dos bad guys and I was saving you. I was saving you lots. We so happy." And then he tucked his little angel face into my neck, clutched his lovey up tight between us, and we laid there for what could never be long enough, and somehow, I fell deeper in love with him again. Seriously, how does he do that?!?!
So he's remembering dreams now. And he's dreaming of me, and saving me in his dreams. Le sigh! These are without question the moments that make all of the screaming, crying, hitting, tantrums, and two-ness of a two year old worth it. I can't wait to hear about all of his dreams from now until he's too cool to tell me anymore. And no matter how many times he "saves" girls in his dreams throughout his life, he saved me first. And I get to have that forever!
Two years ago, I would have been in a hurry to get on to the next task and rushed him awake for something. Okay, all bullshit aside, I don't even think I could have slowed down and relished the moment with a "right here, right now" state of mind like that six months ago. But I'm getting better. Lot's better. I am thankful to a two year old with no patience who has given me the ultimate gift of better patience and the presence of mind to BE in the present. The time is going SO fast so I adore the moments when there is no time, just the moment. And I stop. And I listen. And I feel. And I hold. And I am deeply, deeply grateful.
If you're like me; a task completer, a projector, a got-to-get-it-done type, you know the type.......the type that will go back downstairs after they're in bed for the night if they realize there might be three dishes in the sink because God forbid, they leave dishes.........stop sometimes. And if that's hard for you, fake it till you make it. Because eventually maybe you'll find yourself lots of minutes (Don't count. Don't you dare clock watch.) into a pretty serious snuggle-after-naptime-session and it'll be sooooooooo sweet.
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